The Right and Wrong Kind of Company

Someone came to visit last weekend.  They had been hanging around for some time wanting to visit and they knew when the time was right to come in.

I could easily excuse his visit; saying I was overtired, or my neck and shoulders are full of pain, or I've been overly busy every weekend with events and people.  I could justify his visit and make it seem right; but the truth is I opened the door and let Selfishness in. 

Just like  a two year old having a temper tantrum to get his way, selfishness came in and took over.  I wanted my way.  I wanted control.  I wanted the script to read my way.  I, I, I.  It's all about me!   Selfishness looks through only one lens; mine.  Selfishness pulled up old mindsets.  They resurfaced like shells washed up on the ocean, ones I thought had been washed away; but they were there, and they brought along a friend.

Guilt is a best friend of selfishness.  He comes in and says "you are ugly' you are not worthy, and you have no value - but haha, you invited us in and we want to stay."  Guilt wants to hug me and bring his cousin Shame along to have a party.  Shame is dancing around, it's getting dark.  They want to keep the party going until Destruction comes.

"I DON'T WANT TO DANCE!"  I shout.

There is another visitor at my door.  His voice is tender but His knock is persistant.  I open the door and welcome Forgiveness.  Forgiveness is the opposite of my other guest.  Forgiveness gently instructs and takes my hand and leads me to the path of light.  He gives healing words to say to the ones me and selfishness have hurt.  He turns me on the path to healing.  He brings along his friend called Grace.

Grace holds me. Grace lets me cry.  Grace reminds me I am loved, I am worth it, I am valuable.  Grace calls my name.  The sound of Grace and the touch of Grace brings back Joy.  Without realizing it, I had let Joy take a vacation.  Joy came back.  Joy said, "let's dance".  We danced and Praise came along.   We danced some more and Freedom joined us.  This dance is going to go on and on. 

Blessed are the people who know the passwords of praise,
who shout on parade in the bright presence of God.
Delighted, they dance all day long; they know
who you are, what you do—they can't keep it quiet!
Your vibrant beauty has gotten inside us—
you've been so good to us! We're walking on air!
All we are and have we owe to God,
Holy God of Israel, our King!   [From Psalm 89]

Grace Has Called My Name  by Kathryn Scott

Peace as elusive as a shadow dancing on the wall
life swallowed by the pain of yesterday;
Left broken by the shame of things that I had done,
No freedom from the choices that I’d made;
But with one touch You made me clean;
You met me in my deepest need.
Grace has called my name,
when all that I had left were just filthy stains;
Grace has called my name;
when hope had all but faded far away,
Grace called my name.
Wounded by words that left their mark upon my soul,
dreams overturned by empty promises;
Well intentioned things I’d heard a million times before
just left my heart to grieve alone again;
But with one touch You set me free;
You met me in my deepest need.